The Chicken Tortilla Soup

Years ago, when we left the city in the rear view and settled back into life in Shelbyville, I mourned the ready availability of two things from The ATX:

My Law School Girls . . .

. . . and the chicken tortilla soup of my fave Tex-Mex restaurant. In that order, although it was a closer call than they might know. Not because they weren’t that awesome, but because the soup was.

My mad scientist cloning skills being completely non-existent, there is no duplicating or replacing those girls. But I could do something about my heart-brokenness for the soup.

Through trial and error, and with the patient guidance of The Husband, was born a pot of goodness so good it’s even gooder than the original good stuff, which to begin with was incredibly good. But I’ve been back to visit the original good stuff several times in recent years (for research purposes, three times on my birthday weekend this year) and of this I am sure: what we came up with whips the tail of that other soup. This: THE Chicken Tortilla Soup. The goodest of the good soup goodness.

Trust me.

Here ’tis, in pictures:

In a large pot, bring 1.5-2 pounds of boneless, skinless chicken breasts and 2 large cans of chicken broth to a boil.

Reduce heat to low and remove chicken breasts from broth. Shred chicken with forks (or, alternatively, cube or dice chicken).

Return chicken to broth, adding:

2-3 jalapeños, sliced or diced (less heat: one jalapeño and/or remove seeds before slicing/dicing)

2 tablespoons taco seasoning

1 tablespoon onion powder (or, if you’re one of those people who likes chunks of slippery onion, use 1 medium white onion and just don’t tell me)

1 tablespoon minced garlic (ignore that this is a teaspoon–all the tablespoons were in the running dishwasher) (side note: three teaspoons = tablespoon)

2 limes, squeezed for juice (Ignore that these are two halves of one lime–I took the picture prematurely then had a sticky finger situation and a toddler begging for her picture to be taken too and then I forgot and it doesn’t really matter anyway I just want you to know that I know that there are not 2 limes in the picture. There, now we both know.)

Although, honestly, I don’t always remember the limes. In which case, 2 tablespoons or so from a lime grenade will do fine. Just flip the lid, squirt some juice through the air in the general direction of the pot, yell “INCOMING!!” and take cover, preferably with a saucepan over your head for protection.

Also, preferably, perform the lime-grenade-with-saucepan-for-cover sequence for an audience of children and/or spouse bound to you for better or embarrassingly goofy–they love that stuff. Also, this sequence should be performed every time the lime grenade is used for any recipe. Do not be deterred by groaning from the peanut gallery. Also, they make lemon grenades.

But anyway.

3 chipotle peppers (canned), whole or sliced (less heat: slice the pepper lengthwise and scoop out the seeds)

About half a tablespoon (again, ignore the teaspoon in the picture) of the sauce from chipotle pepper can

1 can “Hot” Rotel (less heat: regular or mild Rotel), shown here hanging with its pinto bean pal

2 tablespoons Mexican oregano (Note: not the same as oregano-oregano. Naaaahhhhttttt.)

Veggie options:

3 medium (or 1 can) potatoes, diced

1 can carrots, diced (or get all authentic and go the fresh carrot route–dicing small so they soften faster)

1 can pinto beans (hanging with the Rotel, above), drained

And, if you’re in the mood for it (which I wasn’t this weekend, thus no picture): 1 can whole kernel corn, drained

Stir all that deliciousness up, bring it to boiling, reduce the heat, cover it, and simmer for about 20-30 minutes, until veggies are heated and tender

The finished soup can be garnished with a variety of goodies: crumbled oven-crisped corn tortillas, grated cheese, sour cream, pico de gallo, cilantro, diced red onion, rice . . . .

If you sit down to upload photos to the blog while the soup is simmering, and forget about the tortillas you put in the oven until they’re blackened Frisbee-like disks? Then just crumble up the tostada shells that you bought as your Plan B. In a pinch, tortilla chips make a fine (although kinda salty) Plan C. And Plan D? Rename the soup Spicy Chicken Soup and pretend it was never intended as tortilla-anything and where did they get that idea anyway and why does it feel like no one ever appreciates you??!? Then loudly announce that you think it needs a little more lime juice and ask if anyone saw where you put the grenade and your helmet.

Plan D is adaptable to any recipe. I currently have 4 lime grenades in my refrigerator (but this photo was taken while they were on my stovetop, obvs).

In the event things start going down (and/or downhill) in here, I am Plan-D ready.

But aside from that is this:

Mmmmmmmmmmmmm.

I promise you: mmmmmmmmmmmmm.

And the leftovers? Slightly spicier, even, and mmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Here’s the print version: The Chicken Tortilla Soup.

You have now been equipped with the perfect pot of goodness to get you through the winter, a spicy remedy for any sinus stuffiness, and the soup that other soup I used to love just wishes that it could be.

Merry Christmas. You are welcome.

But you know what? I got you something else, too.  Stay tuned for The Salsa, later this week.